Lunchtime in Malacca

29th May 2009

Went up to Malacca for the day. Had a very interesting conversation with my very wise friend during lunch. I don't know how we got started, but got into talking about observing our thoughts and trusting our feelings.

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When do we know that our feelings are not leading us astray?

Feelings never lead us astray. We get confused after we try to logic out the feeling. Sadly we are also not taught to recognise our feelings. Instead, we have been told not to go with our feelings and stay logical. Sometimes we are not confident of our own feelings. We do not even believe what we are feeling and therefore miss out on opportunities.

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For instance, when we were giving away free bottles of Metta health tonic, some people did not believe that there are no strings attached. They asked in disbelief, "What? No membership, no minimum sales, no compulsory keeping of stocks and even a free bottle to try?" "Can't be", they thought, "there must be a catch...". Such people will lose out because they have shut themselves off.

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So when a feeling is heard, follow it. Sometimes, the reasons are known later, sometimes, not at all, but they will guide us to flow with the Universe.

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Anyway, we should be happy no matter what. It is a bit more difficult when you have many problems, like going through a divorce, like you have just lost your job...etc. But even these unfortunate events are caused by our thoughts. There would have been a time when you may have thought, you "wished you hadn't got married", or "I am fedup with this job". They were small thoughts, but if they continued as little streams of small thoughts, they will eventually group up to become significant thought forms and take a life of their own.

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When thought forms take a life of they own, they are no longer controllable by the originator of the thought. They will carry on to manifest. They have to manifest, whether they are desirable thought forms or undesirable thought forms, the universe does not make any judgments about them. All thought forms eventually manifest to become events and things.

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It is akin to a rotten tree trunk under water. If you dive in the water, you only see a rotting log. You can't see the miniscule bubbles coming out from the trunk. But then, these little bubbles gather to form bigger bubbles and eventually when they reach the surface of the water, you can hear a 'bloop' of big bubble released into the air.

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So watch your thoughts. They eventually become 'things'. From formless thoughts to form. Then when the form 'dies', it returns to the formless.

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When we reincarnate, we no longer remember what our previous forms are.

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"So what's the point of incarnation?" I asked.

Reply: "No point. Just find joy in yourself and love."

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We live for our own joy. For instance, the Banyan tree just grow gloriously. It doesn't care what it serves you. If children would hang on their roots and swing... it is fine; if you use it as a shade to park your car under, ... it is fine. The Banyan tree does not pretend to live for you. It just continues to grow gloriously.

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Likewise, we don't have to pretend to live for others. Just live for your own joy. So if you hear somebody saying things like,"... I got a calling to heal the world...", it is much of an ego speak. The world does not need anyone to heal.

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Visa

I just came back from the embassy of a Gulf country in the Middle East, where I was asked to show the contract I have with my client before they could grant me the visa. 

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It then dawn on me that I have been working with my client for a few years now without a contract. Each time I sent my invoice I got paid, all based on trust. I am very grateful that I have this very trusting relationship, sadly not very common these days.

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Synchronicity 4

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Someone I know was recently unfairly dismissed from her job. Naturally, she was upset, but I immediately knew that she will get another role more suited to her aspirations. I don't know why, but I just knew.

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A month before she lost her job, she decided to study Chinese. So it seems timely, as now she is freer to pursue that.

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Last week, she got a new role to teach in a local university. Unsual, because she does not have a PhD nor the experience of teaching in a university, but she got the position. She has always wanted to teach in a university.

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Yesterday, she found out that she was selected against the better qualified candidates because she came prepared with a programme and also that she has a background in the Chinese language. She will be teaching (art) aesthetics, and the department prefer someone who can also compare aesthetics from the perception of cultures distant from Europe.

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So listen to yourself. What are the keywords in your thoughts recently? We all have a voice within. A voice some call the "Holy Spirit". Then go with the Flow.

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Patience

[Writing in progress... be patient! :) ]

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I have hurried to post this here before I lose my patience. Also, it is so that I can still capture my feelings about the subject accurately and understand what still keeps me (and my patience) going. :)
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What is 'patience'?
If I still think of when 'something' is going to happen everyday, am I still patient?

Hmmm... I am not obsessive, so I guess I still am.
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An impatient person is one that runs 'out of character' and loses his peace. He is the sort that would dig out the germinating seeds just because he cannot see the green shoots coming out from the ground. An impatient person lacks the trust that the seeds will grow on their own. And of course, having dug out the seeds, the seeds die.
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We have all seen impatient people at some point in our life. For instance, the wife who could not take it any more and left her eternally optimistic entrepreneur husband struggling with his fledging business. Or the impatient business partner who throw insults at his associates because of the prevailing frustrations without offering any better solutions to the problems. Some have even led to law suits over problems that neither party have a fair solution to.
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Conversely, I also have heard of the wife who has been patient and understanding and accepted her husband back, after he has strayed in the marriage. Her motivation for her patience is love.

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Most people are impatient because they have limited themselves to what they can 'see' and their lacking in their 'trust' in the bigger scheme of things.

There are many processes that we cannot see with our naked eye or five senses and we therefore have to based on 'trust' if we want to get anywhere. 'Trust' is easier when we understand more about what is around us. More importantly, 'trust' also means understanding that we are not alone to make things happen.

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For instance, all my achievements, will not be possible without the help of others. Along the process, many of my friends have come forward to offer me encouragement, help and even money to make things happen. They all seemed to trust me totally. This is perhaps because I, in turn, have total trust in what I do and that they will work. I 'trust' because I know everything I can conceive and believe will work. It may take many steps of refinements to work, but they will. And unless I continue to emit this energy, and attract the same to me, success will not come to me.

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So I shouldn't be surprised that 'patience' is considered a virtue by the major religions of the world. (I was surprised, when I first read the Wikipedia about the subject.)
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The Wikipedia defines 'Patience' as:
The state of endurance under difficult circumstances, which can mean persevering in the face of delay or provocation without becoming annoyed or upset; or exhibiting forbearance when under strain, especially when faced with longer-term difficulties. It is also used to refer to the character trait of being steadfast.

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Patience is often described as a core virtue in religion or spiritual practices.

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In the Jewish Bible, Christian Bible and the Koran, Job endures near-apocalyptic calamities without losing his patience or reproaching Divine Providence.

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In Judaism, Patience in God, it is said, will aid believers in finding the strength to be delivered from the evils that are inherent in the physical life.

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In Christianity, increasing patience is viewed as the work of the Holy Spirit in the Christian who has accepted the gift of salvation (salvation = self elevation). The Proverbs note that "through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone" (Proverbs 25:14-16, NIV);

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Through patience, a Muslim believes that an individual can grow closer to God and thus attain true peace. The Muslim faith believes that without a good spirit while enduring, the struggle will not bear its full reward, thus, patiently persevering, striving and going forward, despite the difficulty, is the pinnacle of behavior during challenging times.

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In Buddhism, patience is one of the "perfections" that a bodhisattva trains in and practices to realize perfect enlightenment. Patience is recognized within Hinduism in the Bhagavad Gita. In both Hinduism and Buddhism there is a particular emphasis on meditation, aspects of which lead to a natural state of mindfulness that is conducive to patient, effective and well-organised thought.

Moving 2

Having to move within three weeks without a new place to move to can be daunting, especially when you have to pack the whole place single-handedly. Where am I to bring my things to? Shall I sell the beds? It's such a waste as when I find a new place, I will have to buy everything new! Then some of the beds were supposed to get sold, but the buyer withdrew at the last minute. Shall I sort my things out and divide them accordingly so that they can be stored in three different places? However, despite all these, somehow I knew in the end it will all be alright.

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Up to forty-eight hours before I have to move, I still did not have a place to move to. Then, at 10am on that day, I rang up an estate agent for an apartment, view it at 11am, and agree to take the place on the spot. It is a beautiful apartment in the same condominium as the old apartment is, but nicer - it is on a higher floor, it has a better view and a higher ceiling giving it the feeling of spaciousness. What more, it is at a lower rent than what the ex-landlord wanted to increase his rent for his apartment to.

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What I learned from this episode is that it is important to trust that what we will receive will be for our highest good. To follow our trust, we must stay calm and not be distracted by anger. In this context, it could have been the anger with the ex-agent denial of having received my notice for extension or her siding with the landlord. Staying calm enabled me to have a clear mind to listen and observe, and understand that at the end it will be ok, and if it is not ok, it is not the end! :)

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I am learning to trust that whatever is given to me, I would appreciate it, and whatever that will be taken away from me, I will accept it; and life will be peaceful. This is what Swami Kaleshwar said when he was in Singapore in November 2006.

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Do you have that trust?

Meeting Swami Sri Sai Kaleshwar

Swami Sri Sai Kaleshwar's brief meeting with a small group of us at the Fullerton Hotel, Singapore:

"I have only one thing to tell this group. That is, life is short, make it sweet. When you wake up in the morning, make your day sweet. You don't have any problems. You think you have problems, but you don't have any problems. Whatever is given to you, accept it. Whatever is taken from you, also accept it. Always have trust in Him. If you have the trust, then life is sweet and there won't be problems."

Then, we were told to think of two wishes and go into silent meditation for about ten minutes.

I felt this sense of peace and calm after meeting Swami, though it was a mere fifteen minutes or so. His aura radiates way high. Very strong.

Technology

Some of us may have fond memories about how easy life was before the Internet, mobile phones and fax machines. Life after five were truly 'after work'. Once out of the office, it will be hard to contact you. Life was much slower, less efficient and less anxious. Some may even say that family lives were fuller and happier.

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So does technology give us a better quality of life?

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I am a technologist true and true. I am trained as a civil engineer and an information security specialist, and have lived and worked in 16 cities across Europe, Africa, Asia and Australia as a technologist for many years. I am always fascinated by what technology brings. Overall, I think technology have given me a better life, as I have been careful about handling and using them to my advantage. Without technology, I won't be able to pen (or key) my thoughts in like this and share them with, not only my friends, but the world!

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I use technology for what they are good for. For instance, I let my washing machine do my laundry, my toaster for my toasts and my robot vaccum my floor. All these chores done while I spend my time fulfiling more creative tasks. My robot will go through every square inch of the floor bouncing off walls and obstacles and will stop once it is finished. If I had bought the advanced model, it will even go back and park at the power recharging device and recharge itself. Once recharged, it will wait for its programmed schedule to get off and start vacuuming the room again! Isn't it cool?!!!

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I am writing this posting from the Middle East, where I am on a consultancy assignment with my client. Whilst here, I chat with my friends on webcam, book my air tickets online, check my payments online, and communicate with my clients by emails, instant messaging and sms. In July, whilst here, I even organised a seminar in Singapore and have the surplus of the seminar fees used to help orphanages in Cambodia! All this would not be possible without technology.

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My opinion is that technology will continue to make our lives better, just as long as we know their limitations. There are situations where human face-to-face contacts are important. For instance, many of us still like to have meals physically together with our friends, family and loved ones. It will be different gobbling down the food with someone else thousands of miles away connected by webcam. The human touch is still important and it is the failure to realise this that led friendships, relationships and marriages to falter. There are even of couples proposing for marriages by sms and ironically divorcing also via smses. Often I have observed people in clubs, pubs and cafes sitting around tables not talking to one another, but busying themselves with sending smses to somebody somewhere else, ignoring the persons physically in front of them entirely. :) It does look surreal, but sadly, this seems to be gettng more and more common. I think it is this haphazardness of not living in the present that anxiety sets in, and anxiety is not conducive to build trust. Without trust we don't have relationships.

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When I was a kid, businesses were conducted purely based on trust. Just a phone call for an order and the goods will be delivered, without purchase orders or even receipts. Just cash-on-delivery. That was how my father did his business. One's word was one's honour. It was well known those days that unless one develops a good reputation for reliability and trustworthiness, there will be no business. Perhaps people in that era had more time to develop those relationships and the motivations to keep them, or were they more worldly wise not distracted by the speed, intensity and scale that modern technology brings?

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So amid the humdrum of the modern world and urban living, it would be wise to remind ourselves to return back to basic human values and then to our spiritual selves regularly. Dr Aaron had suggested to me once that I should wake up in the morning and remind myself to love myself and to love others. It is a sweet thought to start the day with and one that has brought me many beautiful days. After all love flows and technology in the end is only an aid.