In Sickness and In Health - Painful Again!

I am in pain again! I have checked my blog and learned that the last time I had this excruciating sciatic pain was thirteen months ago. Then, I took to painkillers.

.

This time, I identified the problem and took action early, doing the exercise below twice a day.

.

.

Oh yes, positive thinking also helped. At the bottom of it, all dis-eases are psychosomatic. Proud to say, I overcame that without the help of painkillers and drugs. Many thanks also to the author of the wonderful video.

.

In Sickness and In Health 15a - Stormy Weather

.

Incidentally, just got this from my Daily Contemplation email subscription:

.

Success isn't measured by money or power or social rank. Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace.

-- Mike Ditka

.

.

In Sickness and In Health 13 - Recover

We all go through ups and downs. This includes our health. While sick, the food didn't taste so good, so I ate very slowly.  Gladly, this has become a habit, as I gradually adapt to the slower pace. This will do my body a good service, as I had wanted to eat slower for a long while, but have not managed to do so. So, falling sick was probably timely.

.

Everything happens for a reason. Now that I am well, I have to remember to continue to listen to it carefully.

.

In Sickness and In Health 12 - the Flow

My cough is unbearable and I needed the cough syrup badly, but the bottle is closed tight. The cap refused to budge even with my bull-strength trying to open it. Tying a rubber band on the cap to enable better hand grip to open didn't work. It was a long time ago since I had a cough and opened the bottle, so the syrup had solidified around the screw threads and glued the cap to the bottle in a deadly embrace.

Not much else I could do, I turned the problem literally on its head in hot water.

.

 

After just a few minutes, it opened without any resistance. I was expecting it to give at least a bit of struggle,... but none at all! The cap turned open effortlessly and smoothly. 

.

From that, I wonder if it is the same with life. That is, if we have the correct ingredients and the correct steps in the correct order, life will just flow. [NLP experts would attest to that!] If we get the ingredients, steps or order wrong, then life will be a struggle.

.

Makes me wonder how I can improve my life in these respects.

.

In Sickness and In Health 11 - Cough

Can't win! I fought the mosquitoes with the essential oil and burner and now the mosquitoes are gone and I get a cough. Add a bit of stress and I am now down with flu. But I still gotta keep my heads high. In sickness and in health, it shouldn't make a difference...

In Sickness and In Health 10 - Heart Attack

Just got news minutes ago that my associate got a heart attack. He was fine when we met two days ago. I guess he has been under a lot of stress. Now he joins two others I know in the occupation who got such attacks. This reminds me to take a long holiday soon.

.

ps. Just visited my friend in the intensive care unit of the hospital. He is doing fine. Apparently he had a medical checkup recently and blood pressure and colesterol levels were healthy. So, it must have been the mental stress. From now, I need to remind myself to watch my thoughts, as it is thoughts lead to anything else.

In Sickness and In Health 9 - Project Life

I was shocked when I saw Zoe's picture in Today newspaper. She is now in fourth stage of cancer. I met her in May and knew she got cancer then, but she appeared so positive I thought she would have recovered.

.

I sms-ed her when I reached Singapore on Saturday, but didn't get any replies.

.

She is continuing her fight against her illness and has many close friends and alternative healers helping her.

.

Read more about her here

.

In Sickness or In Health 8 - Influence

Today is an exceptional day for swinging moods. I woke up fairly relaxed. Then a miserable friend rang and poured out his grievances and heartaches to me and I felt down after that. Later in the afternoon, I chatted with a friend online. She was very happy and without being conscious about it, I became happy. Unfortunately, in the evening, another friend came online and chatted. She was very nervous and stressed, and after chatting with her, I felt the same.

.

I behaved like a radio, receiving their signals and playing their songs. I have to be more careful not to let that happen.

.

The mind by its nature is peaceful and still. It is our moods that make the mind flutter. Much like the leaves on the trees when the wind blows.

.

I shall now let my mind return home to Peace... Om Shanti.

In Sickness or In Health 7 - Pain

Everything happens for a reason. I am in excruciating sciatic pain, from my butts down behind my thighs to the back of my knee. This is the result of sitting down too much and getting stressed out from work.
.
So I got off my chair and went for a long long walk. As I walked the pain disappeared. As I stopped, the pain came back. The walk thus became a walking meditation.
.
Somehow, like toothaches, pains get worse near bedtime. Then, I took pain killers and the pain disappeared. It was as if nothing is wrong with my sciatic nerve. But now, I have to be more disciplined not to sit down too much, as I don't have the pain to kick my butts. Listening to my body now becomes less obvious with pain killers.
.

[more later... I am in pain... arghhhh!!!]

In Sickness or In Health 6a - Fair Weather

.

Fair weather friends are happy when there is money and when the going is continuously smooth. Fair weather friends are friends when the situation is easy and desirable, as it is easier to soak in money, hang around people with money and live their life.

.

But isn't friendship independent from money? Hmmm... sounds good, but does it happen in practice? Do people stick around in sickness and in health? Can friendship remain strong always?

.
For those of you who have not trodden down the paths of hard times, you may not understand exactly what I am moaning about. However, to some of you 'fortunate ones', you may never have a chance to know who your real friends are either. It is when you are really down that you find out who your real friends are.

.

When times are hard financially, we must still not let our spirits down. We must not let the hard times dull our body and soul. We are what we are. We are not what we are with money.

.

I have heard of a friend who likes to impress girls with money. He then got married with one and divorced when he fell on hard times. Then marry another and also divorced later. With no money, so there is no honey. What goes around comes around. For those who believe that they can impress others with money will get fair weather friends or fair weather spouses. But do forgive them if you know any fair weather friends, for they do not know.

.

We all prefer easier times, but hard times makes us stronger and prepare us for the next level of achievements. So life isn't so bad after all. At least I know who my friends are! Now I feel better already! :)

.

More fun read with "In Sickness or In Health 6 - Fair Weather" - Click here

.

Post scriptum:

If given with love, a handful is sufficient.

-- Telugu proverb

.

In Sickness or In Health 6 - Fair Weather

I am happy. The weather is sunny and dry, after weeks of continuous rain. It is easier to be happy in fair weather. I feel more energetic soaking up the sun and getting chores in the house and garden done.

.

But isn't happiness independent from anything 'outside' myself? Hmmm... sounds good, but how do I put it to practice? Does that mean that if I am absolutely peaceful, then it wouldn't matter if it is dark, wet, cold and gloomy outside and I would be equally happy and energetic?

.

Those of you in the tropics who have not lived in cold climates may not even understand what I am moaning about when I speak of depressing weather. You probably have taken all the sunshine everyday for granted. So the next time you see your sunny skies, give your gratitude. It is not the same every where you know?

.

To give you a better idea, I have taken the picture below...

Imagine it is also gloomy and cold the whole day and try feeling happy in weather like this. When it is like this, it is very uncomfortable to go out for a walk to get some exercise and fresh air. That dulls the body.

A few days ago, I chatted with a friend of mine online whilst he was in Dubai. He said he wished he was where I am (during the wet spell), as it was 45C and extremely humid there. I guess he is right. In comparison, I will rather choose it here. I then felt better instantly! :)

There will always be ups and downs in our life, but we must not let it affect our inner peace and strive to stay happy. That's the challenge!

Also, what is desirable is mostly taken from the human perspectives. It is gloomy when it is rainy here, but farmers love it and there are many creatures in nature that need the rain to live. So, whilst I would prefer sunny skies, there will be times where the rain will have to come to give life and make the flowers grow. Thinking about it makes me feel happier already!

.

In Sickness or in Health 5

Everything happens for a reason. After lying horizontal for much of two weeks, I realised my knee pains are gone, and as I had not eaten much, the constipation is gone too. I also have lost a bit of weight, which was about time.
.
By now, I am about 95% recovered. I go cycling in the morning and take short naps in the afternoon. On my regular cycling route, I always dread this long slope up. My mind wanted a powerful and swift upslope run, but my body was panting and crying out for oxygen. I could no longer go up the slope the way I did. The mind is willing but the flesh is weak! :)
.
On the following day, I recovered further and this time with the same mind of going for a powerful swift run up the slope, I managed to pedal myself up to the crest of the road without straining too much. I wasn't panting.
.
The interesting observation on these two days is that on both days, I had the same mindset, but different states of fitness. The mind was the same, but the bodies were different. Here, I experienced and rediscovered that my soul (or mind) and body are separate entities. I am not this body, I am this soul that drives my mind, that drives my body. My mind remained the same. I am proud that I had not allowed the state of my body to affect my mind.

In Sickness or In Health 4

My Internet connection stopped a few days ago, as my provider had upgraded their signals and my modem can no longer synchronise. When the modem cannot synchronise it cannot connect with the Internet. In much the same way, when we cannot sychronise, we cannot connect to the universe.

.

So I bought a new modem to replace the old one. As I was still not feeling too well, I left it on the desk for a day. Mentally too tired to read manuals and install the modem. My impatient housemate then offered to do it. However, instead of using the power adaptor for the new modem, she was lazy and used the old one. She just took the electric cable of the old modem and plug it into the new modem. In doing so, she instantly burned the new modem. The voltage was too high for the new modem. She blew the new modem and thus we still cannot connect. Metaphorically and drawing parallels to spirituality, if we put too much pressure on someone to self-realise, it wouldn't work. He/she will still not connect. Thus religions and spiritualism cannot be forced.

.

Having no Internet connection has its plus points, as I spend more time doing other things that needed doing. Most of all, to spend time by myself and walking in nature. Though walking even short distances at this time still made me pant (as I am still not fully recovered), it was still very pleasant overall.

.

During this time, a friend of mine moved in to my place. I think we both have positive influences on each other. He comes from the Mid West of America where people go to bed soon after sunset and he still diligently follows that. Without the Internet and someone to talk to at home, I too sleep early and wake up early.

.

We also go for our regular bicycle rides along the beaches. Though he has lived in Singapore for a while, he hasn't seen these places. Over the years, he has been busy rushing around. This is his period of transition before moving to the next phase of his life. He is often impatient. I told him not to. Everything happens for a reason and we must capture every opportunity to enjoy the very moment. In this case, the period of tranquility and peace. Soon we will all be very busy rushing again. So enjoy the peace now.

.

I found this video clip from Eckhart Tolle. Watch this. He explains the power of Now very well.

.

.

In Sickness or In Health 3

The flu went on but I continued with my experiment with myself to see if I can keep my mind above all the backaches, giddiness, cough, drowsiness and fever. I managed quite well. I told myself that since my energy was so low, every ounce was precious and many incidents and issues that normally would have mattered to me ordinarily would not be allowed to matter. Then incidentally, one of my business associates at this time was still calling me and was very unreasonable, but it didn't affect me. I was proud that I stayed above it all. It reminds me of the saying, "If you didn't mind, it didn't matter."

.

This went on well. Then gradually I got better. First the cough went, then the backache went, I could then breathe better and feel less drowsy. During this period, the same bothersome business associate came back and was persistent with his unreasonableness despite knowing that I was unwell. This time he did irritate me! "How come?" I wondered. I shouldn't be irritated since I am feeling better now. I should be able to see above everything else even better now that I feel better. Why can't I be above it all like when I was hardly breathing?

.

At this point, I realised that at the time when I was physically weakest, my faith was strongest. Then, I knew that I could not afford to waste any bit of energy left in my body. However, as the body recovers, physical comfort slipped in and I had gradually allowed my mind to descend to the usual pettiness! Oh dear! How did I allow that?! :)

.

I remember a time in Singapore when most of us were poor. Physical comfort, if at all, was very spartan but we didn't know any better. Everybody helped everybody else within strong communities and I could not remember anyone feeling lonely or uncared for. Fast forward forty years on and you now find most people keeping to themselves in their flat after work, watching television, surfing the Internet or indulging in their own material comforts. Now do we find lonely people.

In Sickness or In Health 2

I try to live the same way as I do everyday putting my mind above the flu and fever, but since my reaction is so slow and I can't make sense of familiar things until 'later', I thought I give the bicycle a miss and took a bus. So there I was at the bus stop, which turned out to be waiting, and waiting... Why do I have such bad luck? Sick and yet having to wait unusually long for the bus?!!

.

When the bus came, I just shrugged it off and thought "May be one of the buses broke down, be patient". However, the same long wait for the bus applies on the return trip. Then did I realise, it wasn't a longer wait than ordinary, but just my perception of time, which has instantly transformed the moment the flu hit me last Monday. The bus did not take so long. It just felt so long.

.

From here, I learn that that it seems that we have two types of feelings - one that is highly reliant on the well-being of our physical bodies, such as how long it takes for the bus to come or how long the person is using the only loo in the building when you have a tummy ache; the other type of feeling is independent of anything, such as the need to stay up late to wait for your daughter to come back from late night partying.

.

I am still recovering from flu. I think I am doing quite well in staying above all the giddyness and physical ailments. But then, I am only fighting flu and fever. Two days ago, my young 19 year old Vacuum State reader told me that she has a junior (even younger! :) ) who has contracted cancer but is still amazingly cheerful and positive. I take my hats off to this young girl - she is only 18!

.

This morning, I got an email from a friend who put me to this talk by a neuroanatomist who was down with stroke and experienced her brain deterioriating rapidly in the initial moments of the haemorrhage. It is an amazing 18 minute video. I won't say I have been anywhere close to a stroke, but surprisingly I can relate very closely to some of the mental-perception issues that she described. :)

Click here

In Sickness or In Health

I am not feeling too well of late. It's strange how just a few days ago, I was well and running around and the next moment I'm down with fever and flu. Now, my whole body aches and I struggle just to walk a short distance. It is like a dizzy and surreal walk on a floating pontoon. I can't make sense of what seemed common-sense in better days. I can't even look for something that is right in front of me! I take a long time to make sense of what others say to me. Data retention in my mind seems so hard. It is unbearable even to lie in bed with this acheing body and a persistent painful thundering cough that makes my body curl.

"In this situation, is it possible to be 'above it all'?", I wonder. This is what Father Anthony De Mello said. Is it possible to accept it and not fight it? Father De Mello said that our happiness must not be dependent on anything (including good health), for if we are attached to it, we lose our happiness. That means, to be happy even when we are sick! It is indeed sobering now to 'walk the talk' to see if I can really be happy.

Then, as I logged into my email, I got this message in my daily contemplation subscription:


Do not lose your inward peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset. -- Saint Francis de Sales

post scriptum: It is a big struggle to put up this post, but I thought it is best to write it now while I am totally in the midst of it. :)

.
Here's someone whom I think is above it all. She is six years old. That's probably why. :)
.