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Friday, July 25, 2008

Spiritual Parenting 3a - Voice of Authority

I have just finished reading Mike George's book "Don't Get Mad, Get Wise". Click here
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What I learn from the book is that nobody can make me angry, other than myself; and that it is silly to get angry over something for a long time, sometimes years, over something someone did for 5 minutes. If I am angry, it means I am turbulent inside to start off with and the turbulence became active because I allowed it to be so.
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In it, it says that parents who get angry with their children amounts to making their children feeling guilty and shameful of themselves, resulting in low self esteem. Where the low self-esteem persists, the child will grow up as ill-adjusted adults, some even committing crime. That's why I think anger does not solve anything. Actually, this inflicting of guilt and shame extends to our relationship with adults too, when we get angry with them.
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I think anger is fear motivated. In the absence of anger and fear, peacefulness reign.
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Some quotes from the book:
Page 64
Peace is the state of being, which shapes a state of mind, which generates positive and focused thinking, which are expressed as proactive attitudes and behaviours.
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The presence of peace means the absence of emotional disturbance, and when there is emotional freedom it means the inner eye is not distracted by the world outside or by memories of the world inside.
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page 75
To go with the grain of truth about peace is to realise your peace is not just for you, it is also for the world... when you realise this, you will also recognise how the vibration of peacefulness radiates outwards. When you consciously realise your peace to others and to the world, that's when you will feel its power.
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page 80
Your peace is unquestionably yours, it is you, but unless you channel its power and give it away, it will disappear... when you give it away, it increases in depth and therefore quality.
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In the example of Hadri and his mother getting angry with each other, the father in contrast was peaceful and radiated the peace to both of them. In the end peace and normality resumed in the family. See Spiritual Parenting 3 - Voice of Authority

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