bucky group 20b - Oxymoron

We continue our discussions on Vacuum State's post on "Hunting Down Life's Oxymoron" by Mike George (For more about the blog post, click here).
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Someone suggested that the term 'holy war' could be a paradox rather than an oxymoron. I think it is not possible as inevitably anything 'holy' would put peace, happiness and love first; and war kills, plunders and destroys. [However, I remember I wrote another post about Arjuna, the mytical warrior in the Bhagavad Gita and how he got despondent in the midst of the war having to kill his own relatives. It has some food for thought. Read here.]

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Johnson asked, "How about 'holy shit'? Can 'shit' be 'holy'?"

If 'shit' is not 'holy' we will all be in trouble. Least of all, we would have been seriously constipated! :)

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I have trouble with the suggestion that "constructive criticism" is an oxymoron. Perhaps a lot depends on what we mean by 'criticism'. If criticism is meant for improvement, then the precursor 'constructive' goes very well with it. I think the problem it is often not immediately obvious that some criticisms are constructive. Often it comes much later.

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Elaine brought out that all systems are in the state of flux looking for their new balance. Constructive criticisms therefore serve to find the perpetuating need for balance. What she is describing is Tao.

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Joo Hock elaborated by explaining the meaning of the Tao symbol. Where there is 'order' and 'chaos'; and within 'order', there is a bit of 'chaos' (depicted by the dot of opposite colour), and withing 'chaos' there is a bit of 'order' (similarly depicted by the dot of opposite colour).

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So everything is in a state of change. If we fight the change, we become stressed. So we find that systems or people who are stressed tend to be inflexible. So systems have to be designed to accommodate changes to continue to become relevant.

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I feel that Singaporeans get much stressed. This is strange to me because I find Singapore one of the easiest cities to live in. I think that Singaporeans get stressed because we have suddenly moved from a kampung lifestyle, where we have our feet on the ground to ease the stress to the earth, to a highrise apartment lifestyle. That shift happened in the 70s and that had resulted in an increase in the number of suicides, which called for the set up of the volunteer group SOS (Save our Souls telephone helpline). Another way to ease stress is to spend at least one day a week in nature. For that matter, the Bucky Group spends every Sunday at MacRitchie with nature. This is also an advice from the Dalai Lama.

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There is no point fighting changes. The shop lot that "Hair Affair" is in, itself is going through an enbloc sale (collective sale by voting). If that happens, Joo Hock will have to find a new site for his salon. But it is no pointing fighting changes. If change comes, accept the change and for new things to come into our lives.

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In the days of mergers and acquisitions, many find themselves affected by the internal restructuring. One gets restructured from "Vice President" to "Senior Manager"; then when the next restructuring comes, from the post of "Senior Manager" to the post of "Manager". This is stressful to many who feels unappreciated and manipulated by the prime movers of the merger. But if one accepts it and moved on, the stress disappears.

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There are some who are made 'redundant' in an organisational restructuring. It is thus better to move on and do the 'next' thing instead of brooding over the past. When you move on, you will realise that there is so much goodness waiting. It appears worse when one is made "redundant" in a marriage. One moves on and likewise there is so much new experiences ahead.

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There is another example of a rich family in Singapore where the siblings were fighting over the inheritance left by their parents. Then one of them called it quits, moved on and migrated to New Zealand and made even more money there. It is said that he would not have gotten so rich if he had chosen to stay back to fight for the lesser family inheritance.

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So the moral of the stories is that one needs to be flexible to accommodate changes and moved on to the treasures ahead.

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Postmortem at the cafe:

At the cafe after the session, we spoke about how the Bucky Group has recently changed due to my involvement. That the Bucky Group was in a 'comfort zone', until I came and topple the 'stability' by bringing in different views. These views made everyone see things from different angles.

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I am quite surprise that my alternative views have contributed to the Group. In Singapore, it is quite difficult to find people who are willing to accept views that are not inline with theirs. This is a common problem among 'conformist' societies. Actually, I suffered 'slings and arrows' many times in other groups because many people do not accept alternative views and could not separate what I say, from what I am.

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The other thing which they say I contributed is in improving the memory of the Group. I guess by that they mean the documenting of the Bucky Sessions on Vacuum State.
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My hope is that we can move beyond this by using relevant and effective content in cyberspace, from blogs, online videos and music, as there are a lot of useful content out there. They are also perpetually updated by volunteers.
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Last, we have played this tune in the beginning of the session. It is about the resignation of the former Malaysian Health Minister because he was caught with his pants down in camera. This is e-Citizen civil group at work. Thanks to Cyberspace. Have you wondered why politicians resign only when they are caught in a sexual scandal and ironically get away with it when everyone knows that they have been stealing millions of dollars from the country? Anyway, listen to this and tell me...




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Join the Bucky Group. All you have to do is turn up. There is no membership, no fees to pay, no rules other than the usual common sense and you don't even have to agree with what we say. Besides, breakfast is free on Saturday and very good too!